Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Tuesday Morning Tube Rant: People Who Read Their Books and Papers On My Head

Yes, you read that right - on my head.  You know when you're on a crowded train carriage - nose to armpit with the person next to you (unfortunately I know alllllll too well)?  And it's one of those days when the tube is boiling hot and you think you're going to pass out because the "vents" just aren't blowing enough "cool" air through?  And some banker wanker has just stepped on your sandaled feet with his Church's Oxfords and deemed you too little of a mite to apologize?  And then all of a sudden ... you feel a rustle at the crown of your head.  At first, you think it's your imagination.  Then the rustle starts to become more than a tickle, and more like directly applied pressure.  You turn to find that this source of pressure is a man, in a suit, a good head and a half taller than you, pressing his goddamned paperback (am I supposed to be grateful that it's not a hardback?) or FT into your head.  What the hell.  Seriously?  Srsly?  So you give him the evil look.  Again, you're too small of a mite to matter so he ignores the look.  So then you do the passive aggressive thing and press back into the book.  Yes, that's right, use my head as a book stand and I'll use your book as a head rest.  Ahh ... I'm oh-so-comfortably settling into my new book-pillow when he suddenly pulls away, causing me to topple over backwards. 

The moral of the story is, I should get on an earlier train to avoid this from happening.  Or, people could have the decency to simply endure the 15 minute ride into work without reading their jaw-clenchingly-suspenseful-work-of-non-fiction-on-macroeconomics.


  1. Haha - I remember that all too well! And attempting to position myself so that I didn't suffocate on someone's bouffon hair or get crushed by an offending backpack... A 5-minute scooter ride to work is definitely a more pleasant way to spend a morning! xx

  2. I am so envious, I can't even speak, you lucky thing! xx

  3. I think those stupid jerks just want to make a point: haha, too bad you are so short! He might look like a gentleman, but is basically a sexist, racist, selfish and disrespectful scum.

  4. Ooh yes, people do that! One of my friends who's also on the short side (she's 5'1) was recently complaining about how at a festival a photographer used her as a tripod and rested his camera on her head hehehe. She's going to love that story!


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